A young couple I know separated recently. I feel sad surprised and conflicted particularly about what to do. Both are smart and have valuable careers, but they appear not to have the basic skills to navigate and survive the inevitable pain that relationship brings. It needn’t be that way.
Relationships are hard; and yet they provide us with the most direct way for us to heal and grow, for us to develop into whole human beings, into all we are capable of.
The romantic phase is the honey pot, the fantasy where all our dreams come true – and it’s what we call nature’s anaesthesia. It’s sucks us in to begin a grand journey of challenge and development. And it’s an Odyssey, a hero’s journey, and one of life’s great opportunities for self-transformation.
But like any great adventure, we need the support and the skills to not only survive but to thrive. These are now available to us all if we know where to look.
And it’s the most important work we do, learning how to love ourselves and our partners well.
Good couple’s therapy is worth finding and pursuing, as it can be the game changer that shows us the way forward to get what most of us want – satisfying, stable and securely attached relationships.
Will